Female condoms

I love spontaneous sex! The walk in the door, rip my clothes off, choke me spank me pull my hair kind of sex...okay maybe I've said too much, but you know what I mean. The only thing that gets in between me and that kind of sex is having to stop, run around frantically looking for a condom and having to wait for dude to put it on which always seems to require his undivided attention.

It was no surprise that I was elated when I read that a female condom can be worn up to 8 hours before intercourse. This was sure to be my new best friend!
 I found the female condoms at Walgreen's and while the $3.25 per condom price tag was a bit discouraging, I figured it was going to be well worth the uninterrupted nastiness I had in mind.
The condom looked uncomfortable and has this ring on the top of it that you're supposed to squeeze and insert in your vag as far as you can. I added lube to both inside and out as I wanted to make sure I was ready to go when Contractor walked through the door in a couple of hours. I could definitely feel it inside of me and the ring moved as I walked but it wasn't painful in any way.
As soon as that door opened we started to undress each other and when he said "brb I'm going to get a condom" I proudly said "don't worry about it, I'm wearing one" ;) Not gonna lie, he had that Scooby Doo ruh roh look on his face but went along with it.
We were careful about getting things started, but as soon as we were going at it, there was a sound coming from my vag, it sounded like rustling plastic bags. Later I found out that this noise is normal and can be caused by lack of lubrication (not the case at all).
When the noise stopped I was relieved, but a few minutes later concerned so as we switched positions I  reached for my vag to make sure everything was still okay and to my surprise the condom was nowhere to be found. We checked all around and nothing!
Contractor had to play OB/GYN and dig in my vag to pull it out. By this time I was tense and scared that I might have his swimmers trying to infiltrate my precious egg or even worse that I may catch something from him!
We tried another one, this time with even more lubrication but had the same problem.

In conclusion, I was very bummed. The sensation was good for both of us, because the FC is made from polyurethane it allows more heat to transfer which makes it feels more natural and it's great for those girls who are allergic to latex. However, I think I know what our problem was, the condom is only 6.7" long and about 1" of that is supposed to stay outside of your body. This means that the guys manhood can only be a max of 5.7"! (Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't want, don't want, don't want, don't want, don't want no short dick man!!!)  Thankfully Contractor is longer than that so when he went in full force he pushed the condom in deeper and deeper.
I wish they would make the FC in different sizes to accommodate us lucky bitches who always seem to get the horse hung guys, although I doubt that will happen since the FC has been around for many years and has been unable to gain popularity.
On that  note does anyone want to buy 3 brand new, sealed female condoms? I promise I won't laugh at your man's small dick.

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